Armando Creeper and Mother:
Rags To Even More Rags Story
“I HATE the word ‘comeback’,” insists “fool ghoul” Armando Creeper, while wringing his hands. “It’s ‘return’!” Yes, folks. The world’s wackiest horror comedian, along with his promiscuous much-deceased sidekick, Mother, is digging up his act once more to find his rightful place in the Superstar spotlight. Confident, if not loudly, Armando says he’s “ready for my close-up” and for conquering whatever show-biz challenges lie ahead. “I can say whatever I want with my eyes,” he assures.
Gruesome Beginnings
Spit-fire joke-a-second Armando Creeper and Mother have been entertaining the “great unwashed masses” since 1989. After winning a costume contest at Bobby McGee’s Restaurant in Placentia, California, where First Prize was a well-used hearse, Armando eventually sang and danced on Knott’s Berry Farm’s Halloween Haunt’s main stage before thousands of audiences.
Armando was anointed the “official representative” of comic book stores and radio stations, hosted theaters premieres and promotional events, and made countless appearances at horror and Comic Con conventions, even participating in the infamous Doo Dah Parade. His unique image graced a line of products: goofy trading cards, ghastly autographed photos, a cult-like fan club. The Creepers had their own Creeper Theater film festivals in San Diego and LA, showing vintage classic horror and sci-fi films. Overtly-suggestive in approach, Armando has made astoundingly snarky appearances on National and International TV, even acting in a few feature film movie roles. Armando made many co-host stints on “Horror Kung Fu Theater” with host Nightshadow, the longest-running horror-hosted show in history. After fifteen years of performing came a hiatus.
“I’ve built a career from the underground up,” he smirks. “Sure. Things may look dead on the surface but you should always check for a pulse before you commit to anything…serious… They just made a movie about Tanya Harding and she couldn’t be any more dead to the world.”
The frenzied media, including social media, has presented a refreshed outlook for the veteran performer. “We have to be as famous as possible in a hurry,” bemoans Armand. “Mother is at an age where it took her two hours to realize her push-up bra was on backwards…”
Show Biz In The Blood
What are we to expect next from the die-namic duo? “Nightmares do come true,” Armando explains. “How could you NOT be frightened these days?”
An array of personal appearances and promotional events are on the horizon, of course, where Armando envisions “taking sexual harassment to whole new level, the kind of which the world has never seen”.
Most immediately is the exciting new interactive multimedia website (www.armandocreeper.com) with a planned well-stocked store and vintage Creeper entertainment archives, up-dated productions, plus up-to-the-minute “insider” news…
A 24/7 global toll-free telephone number has been created for loyal fans and others to contact the Creepers directly.
With the advent of the state-of-the-art IntriguismTV (a PPV video streaming platform much like Netflix), which presents uncensored, exclusive original programming, the Creepers will star in a variety of off-the-wall, sure-to-insult-and-sicken projects. First up, the much-anticipated release of thirteen segments of the Creeper-hosted “Creeper’s Classics” series under the Intriguism Moving Pictures/Entar Entertainment logos, in association with RetroMonster.
Feature films, starring the Creepers, are scheduled to be produced over the next year -- a Halloween special, a zombie apocalypse satire, and a not-necessarily-true epic “bio-pic”.
“Zombies are more popular, more accepted, than ever,” Armando confines. “There’s even several in the White House. Heck, the President is married to one. No. Wait. She’s a robot, right? One wants to be politically-correct.”
Remember Armando’s motto: “Don’t let your meat loaf…”